7 signs that they are emotionally hungry for you

Sometimes you grow up learning how to be emotionally independent too soon. Especially when you were raised by passionate parents and I know how hard it is to recognize that … but you are made to be “strong” and “understanding”. Those who do not ask for much.

And over time, that is likely to change. Maybe you did not notice or know about this at first. You just have to be more discriminating with the help you render toward other people.

And while you can make it look like a force from the outside, its core is rooted in growing up feelings that have been invisible for a long time. There is a calmness of emptiness that you really can not explain to others.

Let us find out more about how it comes from how narcissistic parents give you a child who is emotionally hungry and not truly independent.

7 things that frightened parents talk about emotionally hungry, not independent

1. You are more praised for “not needing anyone” than expressing emotions

Mostly children of Narcissistic parentsYou grow up believing that “independence” and “not wanting anyone” can be praised. Because at a young age it did.

Even if it comes at the cost of learning how your mental needs take up too much space. The less emotional support you ask for, the more “mature” or “easier” you will be.

So you start to connect yourself gradually and even sometimes to the emotional needs of others with hardship, shock or frustration.

2. Your mood is made to feel awkward

When you are raised by parents who are emotionally negligent, every time you try to be open about your “feelings”, the conversation becomes about their “stress”, their “struggle” or how you “feel”.

Eventually you realize that shrinking yourself will become a safer option before someone can fire you again. You are used to that feeling of hunger.

Your own reality is presented to you with an interesting version where their attitudes are counted as a way of building “your character” and teaching you “hard love”. But the truth is, it was just a way of their negligence and unavailability of emotion.

Read more here: The Scapegoat Child: 5 Reasons Why Narcissistic Parents Choose a Child to Break Up.\

3. You learned to do everything yourself too soon

As the children of erotic parents, you may have spent so much time in your life becoming so emotional that you never stop asking yourself why finding tenderness from others feels unfamiliar to you in the first place.

Why the need for reassurance with a burning sensation in the chest? Why do you almost instinctively pull back when in fact you want the most comfort?

Sometimes you do not know how such a bad independence pattern is embedded in your core as a result of your psychedelic childhood. It is built into a home where your ability to display and need vulnerabilities is not completely secure.

4. Narcissistic parents confuse your mind from an emotional distance with force

One of the most painful lessons learned by you as a child of erotic parents is probably how they confuse your perception of mental strength with distance.

At some point, you just stop expecting emotional support from your parents and start telling yourself that you do not need it.

You learned how to deal with all your pain alone from the beginning, even at a young age. You always calm yourself down and accept those difficult feelings quietly without making others see.

5. You are expected to understand their feelings – but you rarely understand

You are created to be aware of the triggers and reactions of others. It’s almost like your survival depends on it.

But somewhere in the middle of constantly understanding others, you do not know when you have stopped understanding yourself.

In a healthy environment, parents are the ones who support their children. But erotic parents shift this energy and expect you to comfort them, listen to their problems, manage their mental well-being – leave space for yourself.

Read more here: Children of Narcissistic Parents: The Challenge of ‘Reparenting’ Yourself

6. Love always has conditions on how “easy” you have to deal with

You remember getting more approval when you kept your consent and feeling low or calm about your pain.

And because of that, asking for emotional care, even as an adult, still feels uncomfortable or guilty. They always choose separately from your options, achievements, in fact, your whole appearance under the guise of “want the best for you”.

This constant criticism lowers your self-esteem so you still rely on them for approval.

7. You begin to believe that vulnerabilities will only be used against you.

With erotic parents, your feelings are often ridiculed, minimized, or later occurring during an argument.

So now being open-minded, even to others, may feel insecure and like you are exposing yourself to the worst effects.

You have even seen love and affection given to you in an operational manner. It is given to you as a reward for obedience for doing what they want or want you to do. Everything else is used against you.

How to deal with emotional hunger

Dealing with the erotic parental character makes you adapt to the way of their emotional hunger rather than your own understanding of emotions. Treatment of it requires active and intentional steps:

• Begin to identify where you are giving up, feeling still “good.”
• Practice asking for a little help, even if you feel guilty about it.
• Remember, do not regard high independence as your only acceptable form of force.
• Pay attention to anyone who makes you feel emotionally safe – not emotionally protected.
• Discover the difference between your healthy self-comfort and your emotional loneliness.

It is not easy. But gradually you begin to heal. And that’s a feeling I believe should be pursued. What about you? Share your insights in the comments.

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